The Science Behind Why Giving a Damn is Good For Customer Service

And why one industry nails this better than any other

Photo by Floris Van Cauwelaert on Unsplash

Happy Thursday, y'all! Please Like and Restack this issue to help increase its visibility on Substack. Thank you! And if you getting value from my articles, please consider supporting me by subscribing to Backstage Pass. Free subscribers get access to all free articles as they come out. Paid subscribers have access to all Backstage Pass content with no paywalls. Paid Subscribers also have access to The Vault.

Finally, please check out my Gumroad store, it has digital products that can help you grow your Substack and improve your customer engagement efforts.

Now that the commercials are out of the way, on to today’s Feature Presentation!

Why the Hospitality Industry Nails Customer Service

One of the age-old questions is “Can money buy you happiness?” It turns out, money CAN buy you happiness, but it depends on what you spend it on.

For instance, if you spend your money on products, the associated happiness with the purchase will be fleeting, at best. The joy you experience from having that brand new electronic gadget with all the latest bells and whistles evaporates as newer models offer newer features and the technology becomes dated. Soon, that once fancy electronic gizmo that you loved when new, has become an expensive, and obsolete brick.

But, when you spend your money on experiences, then the associated happiness with the purchase typically increases over time. Think about the family trips you took as a child. The vacations that your entire family still talks about, to this day. As you and your family retell and recount your travels, the associated happiness with the experience increases for all of you. The act of creating those memories together, as a family, gives them more value. And that creates more happiness for you.

Over the last 20 years, I’ve been blessed to be able to help companies, organizations and businesses improve their customer engagement efforts in dozens of industries. The one industry that I always enjoy partnering with is my friends in the tourism and hospitality space.

Perhaps better than any other, the hospitality industry understands the value of excellent customer service. Whether its a hotel, a tourist attraction, or a restaurant, these businesses strive to delight the customer. They have empathy for and an understanding of why the customer is there, and what a rewarding experience for the traveler will look like.

The Science of Why Showing Empathy Works

The best customer service agents are the ones who show empathy for the customer. Showing empathy for a customer isn’t about listening to them, it’s about listening to understand them.

Why they feel the way they do. What are they looking for, and why?

A study entitled “The Experience of Empathy in Everyday Life" was conducted in 2021. This study by Depow et al. used experience sampling with 246 U.S. adults to examine how people perceive and respond to empathy in daily interactions. Participants reported their emotional responses when others showed empathy toward their positive or negative emotions.

Key findings:

• Emotional Response: When others showed empathy (e.g., understanding or sharing emotions), participants reported 30% higher positive affect (e.g., feeling connected, supported) and 25% lower negative affect (e.g., stress, anxiety) compared to non-empathetic interactions.

• Positive vs. Negative Emotions: Empathy for positive emotions (e.g., celebrating a success) was reported more frequently (3x more than for negative emotions) and led to stronger feelings of connection and well-being.

• Behavioral Impact: Empathetic interactions increased prosocial behaviors (e.g., willingness to help others) by 20%, suggesting a ripple effect where receiving empathy encourages reciprocal kindness.

This study shows that customers receiving empathy feel more connected and less stressed, reinforcing why hospitality’s empathetic approach boosts guest satisfaction and loyalty. It also highlights empathy’s role in fostering positive WOM, as delighted customers are more likely to share their experiences.

Photo by ketan rajput on Unsplash

Superior Customer Service Creates Positive Word of Mouth

Recall the study I mentioned at the first of the article that found that money spent on experiences DID lead to happiness. A key component of this lasting happiness was positive word of mouth. We will spend years retelling stories of the 5th grade field trip to the space center, or the time we finally went skydiving for the first time, or that one summer when the whole family went swimming at a creek together.

These are special moments and they create special memories. The hospitality industry understands this, and they strive to become a part of those memories and stories by creating amazing customer experiences. Which goes back to having empathy for the customer. Understanding when a family is on a much needed vacation, and doing your best to help them cherish the moment.

Also, the tourism space has a secret weapon: The Convention and Visitor’s Bureau (CVB). These and similar organizations bring together local businesses and attractions and get everyone on the same page in terms of delivering exceptional customer service.

One reason why customer service isn’t a priority at many companies is because these companies rarely have buy-in across the organization to provide exceptional customer service. Sure, sales and marketing understand its value (but even then, it’s often limited to how it can directly benefit the sales or marketing dept only), but there isn’t a system-wide focus on integrating stellar customer service across the entire company.

When it comes to tourism and hospitality, the local hotel understands that if its customers have a good stay, that will impact their feelings when they go out to eat. And the restaurants understand if they arrive happy and leave happy, they will return to the hotel happy. So when they leave the hotel the next morning to visit the water park, they will arrive in a good mood.

Every business understands that it plays a role in the overall service that each traveler will receive throughout their trip. Every business understands they help contribute to the experience that each traveler has. They are all on the same team in this regard.

Back to Empathy, and How AI Plays a Role

This week,

Neela 🌶️

had a fascinating story about a CEO that was all excited about introducing a new AI chatbot to ‘help’ with customer service.

The one person that wasn’t consulted about the idea? The person responsible for implementing it; The customer service manager.

This is quite common as companies in all industries are scrambling to ‘hand off’ customer service to AI.

Science tells us, once again, that it’s a bad idea.

A study (“Comparing the Value of Perceived Human versus AI-Generated Empathy”) was done earlier this year to examine how well AI could ‘fake’ empathy in responding to customers, versus humans who were showing geniune empathy.

In short, customers can tell when AI is trying to manufacture empathic responses, and they don’t like it.

Key findings:

• Emotional Response: Human-attributed empathetic responses were rated 40% more supportive and elicited 35% more positive emotions (e.g., comfort, trust) and 30% fewer negative emotions (e.g., frustration) than AI-attributed responses.

• Perceived Authenticity: Belief that responses were AI-generated reduced perceived empathy by 25%, even when the content was identical, emphasizing the importance of perceived human connection.

• Behavioral Impact: Human empathy increased trust and willingness to engage further (e.g., continue a conversation) by 20% compared to AI empathy.

Empathy’s power lies in its ability to transform how customers feel and act. Research shows that when people receive empathetic responses, they experience 30% higher feelings of connection and 25% less stress, driving loyalty and positive word-of-mouth (Depow et al., 2021). In hospitality, this translates to guests who feel heard after a service issue, like a delayed check-in, and are 25% more likely to return or recommend the business. Neuroscience backs this up; Empathetic interactions activate brain regions linked to trust, making customers feel valued on a biological level. These universal responses explain why the hospitality industry invests heavily in empathy, and why other industries should follow.

What’s the ROI of giving a damn about your customers?

---

Backstage Pass teaches you how to better connect with your customers, readers, clients, or donors. The lessons shared here draw on my experience over the last 20 years building customer engagement strategies for companies like Adobe, Dell, Club Med, Ingersoll-Rand, and countless others. I give you real-world research, examples and tactics that show you how to create customer engagement efforts that drive real business growth.

---